Monday, May 19, 2008

Apology to Readers (?)

I do apologize to my readers (if indeed you are there). I have been dull. I have been lazy. I have been in a slump. Literally. I need to stand up straight and get going.

I think part of my problem is a result of reading other blogs. I see such magnificent work and read such uplifting posts -- yet I feel worse. I am not jolly jolly jolly. I am not a whirlwind of creativity. I need to accept this (for now, anyway) and stand up straight and get going.

When I do not feel productive, I do not feel happy. When I am "just" doodling and experimenting I feel bad. Outside of extensive therapy, I don't know how to get past this.

Shown above are some doodles. I have no plan for these doodles. Will I make them stamps, will I make them quilts, will I just turn the page in my sketchbook and forget about them? I am thinking about simplifying my work (even more) and starting fresh. I know some readers may be thinking, "How could she get more simple?"

I have been fantasizing about being a master quilt artist. I just purchased Masters - Art Quilts by Lark Books. Such beautiful and meaningful work inside. I am on page 18. HA HA HA HA HA. Just kidding. Perhaps I will be in the 42nd edition one day. I do understand these things do not happen overnight. Years and years of work and exploration go into this. Yet right now, I feel I must go backwards before I can go forwards. I must play with circles and squares. It does not feel right for me to set afire Tyvek, apply 10,000 beads, or dye cotton with far-flung monks. I will do small things.

What do readers look for in a blog? My goal is to get things off my chest (otherwise known as bitching and complaining), tell a funny (or probably not so funny) story, encourage other artists, make some new friends, share information (when I have it), etc. Does anyone want to read a "one hundred things about me" list? Remember, you do not even have to like my work to comment.

I am sending out a portfolio this week to a somewhat local gallery. I think it looks great. I think my work will complement the other work in the gallery. Let's see what happens.


Fibra Artysta said...

This happened to me last year and for me, I had to let it run its course. It got worse when I tried to "force it" myself back into my usual routine.

What worked for me was actually playing around in other creative areas. I started knitting, I did some paper art, I made some goofy plushies. Nothing serious, nothing demanding, THINGS WITH NO EXPECTATIONS.

Don't compare yourself to others, you'll just torture yourself. You do beautiful unique work and that is all that matters.

Good luck!

paula said...

you blog just fine and you have readers because i see in my rss feed that others also have you in their feed.
you are funny, interesting, REAL. and that is what i look for in my blog.
maybe you are going to start doing something much different, maybe not...whatever the reason i empathize because it just sucks beyond belief when you want to do something but nothing is flowing.
sometimes though when i am honest with when i am 'blocked' i either a)dont really want to be making art but feel i should or dont know what else to do or b) i'm truly tired of the same thing and need to break free but am afraid or paralized.
i have confidence you will come out of this in due time, you have a large block of work in your trails and i doubt the well has run dry.

Kim Hambric said...

Lynn and Paula, Thanks so much for your encouraging words. I'm going up to my studio to work on circles and squares. Simple things. And I must instruct my husband to stop asking what I'm working on.

Nellie's Needles said...

Your blog is one I wouldn't miss catching up with every few days. I perceive that it is honest and earnest and appreciate the bits you share about your home life along with your creative adventure. And you know an adventure is not all joy and forward movement ... stops, detours, and obstacles are part of it.